Pam Ann Presents: The PamAnny Awards!
- Events
Get Out! Contributor
- 0
- 3 minutes read
///By Tom Tietjen
The ferociously fashionable Pam Ann returns to NYC with her most explosive comedy show yet! In Pam Ann: Full Throttle, the hostess with the mostest strips bare all the latest air travel headlines: from Obama blocking the merger of American Airlines with US Airways to the Bay Area TV station that aired fake, offensive names of Asiana Airline pilots. No news story is safe from the comedian’s witty candor.
Here, she presents the firstever Airline Industry Awards, better known as the PamAnnies.
The nominees for BEST CUSTOMER SERVICE are:
British Airways:
They kick you in the cunt when you board, shake babies and push you into your seat.
Virgin America:
They give head on boarding and promote deep throat. Stewards are covered in cum.
Lufthansa:
They don’t just seat you. They whack your ass into your seat with a paddle. They don’t have seat belts. They have harnesses in economy and slings in first class – and the crew fucks you bareback.
WINNER:
Lufthansa wins for slings in First Class.
The nominees for HOTTEST LOOKING CREW are:
Virgin America:
The crew all have silicon implants, wear “come fuck me” pumps and cock-sucking coral lip-gloss. And that’s just the boys.
Jamaican Airlines:
Once you go black you don’t go back – for a reason. Their cocks are so big! That’s the reason Pam Ann has an asshole like a hippo’s yawn.
TAM (The Brazilian Airline):
They just wear dental floss and look hot in a paper bag.
WINNER: Jamaican Airlines for their big black cocks.
The nominees for BEST FIRST CLASS are:
Emirates:
They have showers in their first class cabin and show movies that haven’t even been made yet.
British Airways:
The British horses take care of you like royalty. They breast feed their first class passengers.
Lufthansa:
Service is pure excellence. They sprinkle the first class cabin in rose petals.
WINNER:
British Airways, of course. A horse is a horse, of course of course, and who doesn’t want to be served by a horse?
The nominees for BEST AIRLINE OF THE YEAR are:
Only one. Pam Ann Airlines.
They don’t make the same mistake more than three times… maybe four.
Pam Ann: Full Throttle
speeds into XL Cabaret for three shows only Friday, September 20 and Saturday, September 21.
Tickets available online at xlcabaret.com
