Pam Ann Flies Again

Pam Ann, the original queen of the skies – who has toured with Cher and crewed private jets for Elton John – is back in New York and this time, she means business. She aims to knock the plastic smiles off the imposter hostesses on TV’s Pan Am in her raucous new production, PAM ANN NEW YORK CITY LAYOVER – ‘GETEM BITCH.

“I named the show PAM ANN NEW YORK CITY LAYOVER – ‘GETEM BITCH because that’s what I intend to do,” says Pam Ann. “And now is the time since the show’s ratings are going down quicker than me in a jet packed with men from Tel Aviv.”

So shut the f**k up, sit the f**k down, lock your seats in the upright position and prepare to take off for the ride of your life. PAM ANN NEW YORK CITY LAYOVER – ‘GETEM BITCH crash lands at Joe’s Pub this week.

Did you really inspire the new ABC series, Pan Am?
You bet. I’ve been fighting to reclaim the glamour in the skies for years, and now these Christina Ricci bitches think they’re going to move in on me. You can’t beat the real thing. It’s Pam Ann, not Pan Am, bitches!

What does it take to be a flight attendant these days?
Cocaine and champagne.

Your new show is PAM ANN NEW YORK CITY LAYOVER – ‘GETEM BITCH. Why such a long title?
Honey, I like things long.

What was your inspiration for the show?
Long nights wondering what has happened to the airline industry.

Has the golden age of travel flown by?
Qantas is grounded, Ryan Air is considering offering porn on board, LOT airlines has no landing gear and British Airways is encouraging its cabin crew to hug a pilot. I’d say we’re in the golden shower “piss” age of travel.

Why do gay men love you?
When I was 16, I escaped suburbia and ran into the arms of trannies and drag queens. They became my family, and from there I met the gay boys.

What’s the best thing about making people laugh?
It is the best feeling ever. Bill Cosby once said if you trust the audience and the audience trusts you, that’s when all the doors open in your head and the real magic happens.

What exciting new projects are you working on? I just launched my brand new app, The Pam Ann City Guides! If you ever wondered what I did, where I stayed and ate on my layovers in the Big Apple, London or Sydney, this terrific app is for you. Plus it has some fab photos and videos on it to pass the time in the airport if – or I should say when – you are delayed.

Is it true you’ll be filming your next DVD at Joe’s Pub?
Yes! The new DVD will be out in June. Come to the show and, who knows, you might see your pretty face on my new DVD!

PAM ANN NEW YORK CITY LAYOVER – ‘GETEM BITCH takes off at Joe’s Pub
(425 Lafayette Street) December 11th-13th and December 21st-23rd.
Visit www.joespub.com
for ticket prices and showtimes.

pamann.com

– Sebastian Darby