Empress XXXVlll Ruby Starling: “Night Of A Thousand Gowns”

The 39th annual Night Of a Thousand Gowns will dazzle this year on Saturday April 5th at the Edison Ballroom from 6:00 PM until 11:00 PM. In all of her glory, Empress XXXVlll Ruby Starling will be giving up her crown and relinquishing her reign. 

Each year, the Imperial Court of New York holds one of the most glamorous and sparkling galas with a Red Carpet reception, a gourmet dinner, drinks galore, a silent auction and dancing and entertainment, all in the name of giving. This year, the gala will be benefiting Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS. 

Get Out Magazine spoke to the Empress about the event and her reign.

INTERVIEW >>>
 
First and foremost, what will you be wearing at Night of a Thousand Gowns?

I’ve been carefully considering what to wear for weeks – not because I’m obsessed with appearances, but because it’s a way to feel confident and celebratory. It’s an opportunity to present my best self, both inside and out.

Obviously, I cannot commit to one outfit. In the tradition of Night of a Thousand Gowns, I will be presenting four different outfits that represent the colors we chose for our reign, which are white, gold, red and blue, as well as a special outfit for our Broadway themed opening number, to get the evening going.

Which part of the Gala are you most excited about?

First off, let’s talk about the cause. The organization 

we’re supporting, Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS, does incredible work, and knowing that our event will contribute to their mission fills me with so much hope. It’s like being part of something bigger than myself, a collaborative effort to make a real difference. 

But it’s not just the impact, it’s the whole experience! Let’s be honest, a gala, when done right, is just pure magic. It’s like stepping into a movie for an evening, where everyone is dressed their best and ready to connect.

And the people! I’m excited to be surrounded by a mix of individuals, each bringing their own unique energy. I’m envisioning engaging conversations, swapping stories and building connections that go beyond the superficial. It’s about forging a sense of community, a feeling that we’re all in this together, working towards a common goal.

As Empress, what were some of your most rewarding experiences?

Some of the most rewarding experiences have been the moments of raw human connections we make during our outreach program, “Hearts & Voices”, in which we visit care facilities and bring joy, music and love to the residents that are often unable to leave the facility due to health concerns. I’ve witnessed the strength and resilience of the people we serve. Individuals that, despite everything they have gone through or are going through, still maintain a strong and positive attitude. 

These individuals have taught me more about courage, compassion and resilience than any textbook or self-help guide ever could. Their stories aren’t just moving; they are inspiring and a constant reminder of the inherent good in humanity. Witnessing their ability to overcome adversity again and again is a daily lesson in hope and perspective.

What was it that made you want to hold the title of Empress?

I have been part of the Imperial Court of New York since 2018. Since joining, I was exposed to the importance of the work we do and the funds we raise for the community. It’s the feeling of genuine purpose I’ve found here. It’s the knowledge that, even in a small way, I’m contributing to a world that is a little bit kinder, a little bit more compassionate and a little bit more just. 

My experience working with the ICNY has been a journey filled with countless small acts of kindness, moments of profound connection and lessons in resilience and hope. I wanted to make sure I put my best foot forward and be involved as much as I can. Being an Empress is an integral part of one’s personal effort to lead the organization’s charitable efforts for a full year.

What was the most challenging part of your reign?

Like any worthwhile endeavor, charity work comes with its own set of challenges. We often hear about the logistical hurdles – the fundraising, the organization, the sheer amount of effort required – and those are definitely real. But for me personally, one of the biggest challenges I faced was finding the balance between family needs, professional and work obligations and the needs of the Court and the community.

Another tricky area is the temptation to feel like you’re “not doing enough”. When you are exposed to so much need, it’s natural to feel like your efforts are just a drop in the ocean. I’ve been struggling with those feelings – wishing I had more resources, more time, more to give. But, honestly, it’s important to acknowledge your own limitations. You can’t fix everything and you can’t possibly meet every need that comes your way. It’s important to find healthy ways to cope with the emotional challenges. For me, that means talking through my experiences with friends, family and other volunteers, making time for self-care and reminding myself that I’m doing the best I can with the resources I have.

What is your most precious memory that you will take with you forever about this past year?

My most precious memories are created when volunteering in any of the care facilities we work with. These moments are not about the spectacle, glitz or glamour. They represent pure human connection and a reminder that even the smallest act of kindness can make a world of difference. Connecting with the residents, seeing them joyfull, singing and dancing, brings me so much happiness. That feeling lingers with me long after I leave the facility.

This year reaffirmed for me that true rewards don’t come from personal accolades or material gains but from the joy of contributing to something meaningful, the power of human connection, which I am eternally grateful for. It’s a journey that I’m excited to continue, even after I step down from my Empress position.

What advice can you give to the newly crowned Empress-to-be?

I am incredibly excited for what the future holds for our next Empress, Sugar, and her Emperor, Tony. Both of them have been in this role before. But if I had to give my two cents, I would say to spend time with the people our organization serves and see the impact our work is having on their lives. This connection will ground you and remind you why you’re doing what you’re doing. It’s easy to get caught up in the administrative details, the fundraising targets and the board meetings. But never lose sight of the human element. Let the vision of a better future for those we serve guide every decision you make.