Ian-Michael Bergeron

Dictionary.com Audacious: adjective, extremely bold or daring; recklessly brave; fearless: an audacious explorer. (How I want to be.) Prologue You already know how this story goes. If this were a book by Andrew Sean Greer or Elizabeth Gilbert, you’d be reading about a trip around the world: spaghetti in Italy, a fling in Paris, a trek across the Sahara desert. But the borders are closed, as covid-19 continues to spread. I will not be eating...

After being broken up for a week, my boyfriend and I decided to give things another try. I’d asked him to stay—begged him, if we’re being honest—and I was ready to put in the work. So we signed up for couples therapy. I didn’t think I was acting “unsupportive” or “parental”–two things I’d been accused of—but I went into therapy with an open mind. Maybe I don’t come across the way I feel, I told...

May 1st was my two-year anniversary with my boyfriend. It seemed impossible that we’d be celebrating in quarantine. The year before, we went to Olive Garden in Times Square. That might sound silly, but it’s where we had our first date. James had been interested in me for some time, but I was seeing someone else. James and I were already roommates, so when things got romantic, it was easy to put off the first...

May 25th was the day that George Floyd was murdered. The video, captured by 17-year-old Darnella Frazier, quickly went viral, and the world watched. Police pinned him to the ground while arresting him for an alleged fake $20 bill: you can hear him say “I can’t breathe” repeatedly, and then he didn’t say anything ever again. The next day, the protests began. We all watched Minneapolis protest that night. I called a friend of mine...

By Mid-May, I realized that I hadn’t left the apartment in weeks. Late March was the last time I’d been outside my apartment, and then I got sick. I was stuck in bed for eight days, but when the body aches, headaches and fever left and my sense of taste and smell came back, my desire to go outside did not return. I didn’t realize it at the time. My boyfriend James had taken care...

By April, out of work since March 17, I struggled to find ways to pass the time. I kept getting the same message from everyone: “Oh, you must be writing so much!” Family, roommates, friends, people I barely knew, all wanted to know what I was writing. “You finally have the time to write!” they all said. I can see them now, each and every one of them gathered in my mind, speaking in unison....

In the beginning of April, two weeks after being temporarily let go from my job due to Covid-19, I became ill. I didn’t have chest pain or shortness of breath, the telltale signs of Covid-19, but I was coughing, congested, had body aches, had a fever over 102, and (the worst of it) had constant headaches. Several times a year I get migraines, the kind where your head pounds, you feel nauseous, you can barely...

Mid-March, officially without jobs due to Covid-19, my boyfriend James and I began going on morning walks. We woke up around 9:00 every morning—not with an alarm, but naturally, something I’m unaccustomed to—and walked two blocks to J. Hood Wright Park. The week I was fired was the week that non-essential businesses were shut down, and we barely saw anyone on those walks. Other than getting groceries, these morning walks would be my only time...

March 17 is a date I believe I will remember for the rest of my life. It was a Tuesday—I think I’ll remember that, too. I just looked it up on my phone’s calendar to be sure I’m correct: March 17 was St. Patrick’s Day. I had no idea until just now. I don’t remember if I wore green or not. My subway ride in to work was different that day. Maybe the subways had...